Dear Wellspring Family and Friends,
It’s been one of those weeks when I yearned for the week to end. It had been a particularly draining week for me to have encountered several people who seemed quick to focus on the faults and failures of others, and overlook the goodness in people. One experience in particular was a physical therapist who made a first-time home visit to my 95+ year old aunt and uncle’s home. During her visit, the therapist saw a piece of rope by my aunt’s wheelchair and immediately thought the worst of the caregiver. The therapist filed a report with Adult Protective Services (“APS”) and the next day, three investigators were at their home, questioning my aunt and uncle, and their neighbors. When I finally received a call from APS and Kaiser, it was too late to prevent what had been set in motion from inaccurate assumptions. In the end, there was no merit to the therapist’s claims. However, Tess, who has been the absolute best caregiver to my relatives for over a year now, was shaken up and hurt by the false accusations.
“How can I be helpful in conveying that false assumptions and judgmental words are hurtful and harmful to anyone”, I wondered. As my week progressed, I witnessed more of those kinds of hurtful and harmful conversations, in work, with friends and family. I was so disturbed. Don’t’ all of us have flaws and something we’re needing to work on all of the time? God will never be done with us until we leave this earth to join Him in His Home. What frustrated me about the therapist was the absence of her taking time to ask more questions of Tess; to find the truth and gain understanding. Then, there would have been no reason to assume the worst. What saddened me was how hastily we do think the worst of someone, rather than contending that there is good, and being helpful to them in their journey to being better. Had the therapist gone further to ask Tess, or even check with others who knew Tess, the situation wouldn’t have been blown out of proportion, and the potential for a good working relationship wouldn’t have been missed.
My sadness also came from realizing that being around unhelpful judgments and assumptions is like an infectious disease. While a good word, thought or deed can bless others, in the same instance, a harsh word, thought or deed can easily tear down a relationship. I realized as these people judged and criticized one another, in my own mind, I was beginning to judge, criticize, and make false assumptions about them, for their comments! Enter Jesus. Proverbs 4:23 says, “Watch over your heart with a diligence, for from it flow the springs of life.” I’m moved by the Holy Spirit and God’s deep desire for good ways of relating, to try harder to speak up, in truth and kindness, in the hopes of being “helpful” and not “hurtful”. God created us to love. “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but
rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” (1 Cor 13: 4-7)
Love Never Fails,